An Unforgiving Heart Is an Unforgiven Heart

 

The Lord’s Prayer doesn’t stop with “Forgive us our debts.” We also pray “As we forgive our debtors.” 

That begs the question, What exactly is forgiveness? 

The context of the Lord’s Prayer helps us formulate a definition. Forgiveness involves canceling a debt or remitting a payment. 

Forgiveness doesn’t mean the consequences of our actions will always be removed (e.g., the thief on the cross didn’t get to live just because he was forgiven), nor does it mean we can’t be discerning in our judgments about others. 

Forgiveness is not a feeling but a decision to let go of the debt owed us. 

Forgiveness means we say no to revenge, trusting that God is the one to avenge (Rom. 12:17–21). 

Forgiveness means our sins are no longer counted against us and we no longer count the sins of those who have hurt us.

In one sense, we should forgive all those who sin against us. We should not seek their harm. We should pray for them and desire their good. 

But in another sense, forgiveness can be granted only to those who seek it. That is, while we should always be ready to forgive, unless the other party is willing to repent, forgiveness cannot reach its full bloom.

Forgiveness implies the restoration of a relationship, and without repentance a broken relationship cannot truly be restored. 

So here without reservation is the Bible’s demand that we forgive as we have been forgiven. As long as there is repentance, there must be forgiveness (Matt. 18:21–22). 

“For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses” (Matt. 6:14–15). 

The unforgiving heart is the unforgiven heart.

Adapted Excerpt From: Kevin L. DeYoung & Jerry Bridges. “The Good News We Almost Forgot.”